Earned, Not Expedited
By Deborah Stallings, MA, SHRM-SCP
April is Stress Awareness Month. While focus often falls on workload, deadlines, and burnout, there is also significant stress created by how people experience one another in today’s workplace, a dimension that is commonly overlooked.
There is a growing, often unspoken, tension in today’s workplace. It stems from misalignment in how respect, leadership, and core values are defined across generations. This misalignment is shaping workplace culture and increasing misunderstandings in subtle and significant ways.
This tension, often called a generational divide, is commonly attributed to communication styles or work-life balance. However, the underlying shift involves how respect, leadership, and core values are demonstrated. When these elements become misaligned, stress spreads beyond its original causes.
Stress in this context stems from both work volume and the quality of interactions, expectation clarity, and shared values.
A Personal Reflection
I have always been drawn to people who are older than me. Even as a child, I was intentional about being in spaces where I could learn from those who had lived through experiences I had not yet encountered. I asked questions, listened closely, and paid attention.
While I did not adopt everything that was shared and had many valuable lessons to learn, much of what I learned shaped my beliefs and core values. Those relationships with great wisdom accelerated my learning, grounded my perspective, and gave me an appreciation for prudence and sounder judgement that cannot be replicated through formal education. They also taught me that growth is not only about moving forward. It is about understanding what came before and allowing those lessons to strengthen what comes next.
There is a depth that comes from learning across generations. Without it, progress may still happen, but it is often slower, less stable, and more reactive.
A Signal, Not an Isolated Moment
Recently, at a human resources management conference, a presenter shared that their research included a survey response from a human resources professional who stated that an older colleague should retire because of age. That comment was not only inappropriate. It was revealing. It was deeply concerning that such a perspective came from a professional responsible for ensuring fairness, equality, and respect for all at work.
It reflects a broader cultural drift in which age is too often equated with irrelevance and experience is not consistently recognized as an asset. It also signals a growing level of comfort with statements that, in the past, would have been addressed immediately, not only for legal reasons, but because they violated a shared standard of respect.
Research supports that this is not an isolated issue. According to the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM), 30 percent of workers in the United States report experiencing age-based unfair treatment. Among those individuals, 72 percent have considered leaving their jobs as a result.
This is not simply a compliance concern. It is a reflection of culture. When culture is not clearly defined and consistently protected, individuals rely on personal assumptions rather than shared expectations. Over time, this weakens alignment and increases friction.
Ambition, Preparation, and the Readiness Gap
At the same time, we are seeing an acceleration of ambition, particularly among younger professionals. There is a strong desire to contribute, to lead, and to advance. That ambition is not the issue. In many ways, it is a strength.
The challenge emerges when ambition is not supported by preparation.
What we are seeing in many environments is a compression of the development process. Leadership is pursued without the same emphasis on mentorship, apprenticeship, and lived experience. Titles are sought before the foundational skills and judgment required to sustain those roles have been fully developed. Guidance is not always rejected, but it is often undervalued.
This creates what can be described as a Readiness Gap. It is the space between aspiration and preparation.
When the readiness gap is unaddressed, pressure mounts on individuals, teams, and organizations, accelerating frustration, misalignment, and stress.
Workforce data reflects this tension. Employers frequently express concern about the readiness of early-career professionals, particularly in areas such as communication, professionalism, and the ability to receive and apply feedback. At the same time, many younger professionals express a strong desire for growth, development, and meaningful work.
The problem is not ambition, but the gap between ambition and the preparation required for long-term, effective contribution.
Many professionals entering the workforce today do, in fact, want mentorship and development. However, they are often shaped by environments that emphasize speed, visibility, and immediate progress, while navigating systems where pathways to growth are not clearly defined.
When expectations of speed meet the reality of growth, which requires time, discipline, and cultivation, friction occurs. When that friction is not addressed, it becomes a source of stress.
What We Risk Losing
While organizations focus on adapting to the next generation, there is less discussion about what may be lost if the current generation is not fully valued.
Seasoned professionals bring more than experience. They bring perspective, judgment, and context developed over time. They have navigated uncertainty, made difficult decisions, and learned from outcomes that were not always predictable.
This is not outdated knowledge. It is foundational.
Yet many experienced professionals report feeling overlooked or undervalued due to assumptions about their capabilities. Too often, organizations do not engage them in meaningful conversations about their continued contributions or how their experience can support others.
When organizations fail to integrate the experience of seasoned professionals, growth loses depth and sustainability. Short-term gains obscure long-term vulnerability.
The Behavioral Shift We Cannot Ignore
Alongside these shifts, there has been a noticeable change in workplace behavior. It is often subtle, but its impact is significant. Attention in meetings is divided. Communication becomes more casual. There is an increasing willingness to critique leadership without a full understanding of its complexity.
These patterns are often attributed to generational differences, but they point to something more fundamental. They reflect a lack of clarity around expectations and an erosion of shared standards.
When expectations are not clearly defined, individuals fill in the gaps on their own. Over time, this leads to inconsistent ways people show up, communicate, and collaborate. What one person considers acceptable may be experienced by another as disengaged or dismissive.
This misalignment affects more than productivity. It affects trust. And when trust is inconsistent, stress increases, not because of the work itself, but because of how people experience one another while doing it.
This Begins Long Before the Workplace
These dynamics do not begin at work. They are shaped long before individuals enter professional environments. They begin in families, are reinforced in communities, and are influenced by the broader culture, including social media.
April 23 is recognized as Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day. While it was originally created to expose young people to career possibilities, it also offers an opportunity to shape how the next generation understands work.
This is not only about what we do. It is about how we treat people while we do it.
Young people may not always realize they are being shaped, but they are constantly observing behavior. They watch how leaders engage with others. They notice how experience is valued or dismissed. They learn whether leadership is earned over time or assumed prematurely.
These observations form expectations that carry forward into adulthood. They influence how individuals engage, respond to authority, and define success.
The Culture Equation
Peter Drucker is widely credited with the saying, “Culture eats strategy for breakfast.” That perspective remains relevant, particularly in today’s workplace.
Culture is shaped through decisions, behaviors, and expectations. Hiring influences culture. Culture shapes behavior. Behavior drives performance and shapes how people experience work.
When respect is not intentionally cultivated, it becomes inconsistently practiced. When behavior is inconsistent, trust weakens. Over time, this impacts both performance and well-being.
This is not theoretical. It is operational. It shows up in how decisions are made, how feedback is delivered, and how individuals engage with one another each day.
A More Complete View of the Problem
These are not just generational challenges. They reflect cultural issues. Addressing them requires a shared, intentional approach to respect, leadership, and culture.
If we focus only on generational differences, we risk missing the deeper cultural challenges that influence how we work together. Both newer and seasoned professionals express concerns about being misunderstood or undervalued, yet this shared experience presents an opportunity. By intentionally bridging the gaps in values, preparation, and respect, we can create workplaces where every generation feels seen, heard, and empowered to contribute. The future of our organizations depends on our ability to honor the past, invest in growth, and foster a culture that truly values both ambition and wisdom. This is how we build not just resilient teams, but a more collaborative and successful future.
This is not a one-sided issue. It is a system that lacks alignment. To move forward, we must acknowledge the shared responsibility to close these gaps. By recommitting to respect, preparation, and the value of experience, we can build workplaces defined by trust, growth, and resilience. The future of work depends on our ability to blend ambition with wisdom, speed with depth, and individuality with shared standards. That is both our challenge and our opportunity.
When expectations, values, and behaviors are not clearly defined, inconsistency grows. Over time, that inconsistency leads to disengagement, tension, and breakdowns in collaboration.
Addressing this requires moving beyond assumptions and toward intentional alignment.
A Call to Realignment
If organizations are serious about addressing stress, they must look beyond workload and flexibility. They must examine the cultural foundations that shape how people experience work.
This begins with clearly defining the culture, intentionally developing leaders, and recognizing the value of contributions across generations.
Leaders play a critical role in this process. They must establish clear expectations for behavior and consistently model them. Advancement decisions should be based on readiness and demonstrated capability rather than urgency.
Teams must commit to presence, accountability, and collaboration. Diverse perspectives strengthen outcomes when they are supported by shared standards.
Human Resources must design systems that assess not only technical skills, but also values, mindset, and readiness. Development pathways should be clear and structured, ensuring that growth is supported rather than assumed.
Communities and faith-based organizations also play an important role. They help reinforce values such as respect, accountability, and the importance of learning across generations.
Families provide the earliest foundation. Respect must be taught, modeled, and reinforced. Exposure to different perspectives and lived experiences helps build understanding and appreciation for others.
Realignment is not about returning to the past. It is about strengthening what supports sustainable growth while adapting to what is changing.
Closing Reflection
What we see on the surface is often the result of what has been developed beneath it.
Workplaces do not simply produce results. They reflect the values, behaviors, and expectations that sustain them.
If organizations are not intentional, they risk creating environments where influence is expected but not earned, where experience is present but not utilized, and where stress becomes a natural outcome of misalignment.
There is another path forward. It requires intention, discipline, and clarity. Leadership can be developed in ways that are sustainable. Respect can be reinforced through consistent practice. Culture can be cultivated to support both growth and stability.
Because in the end, what we build will always reflect what we believe.
References
Deloitte. (2025). 2025 Gen Z and Millennial survey. https://www.deloitte.com/global/en/issues/work/genz-millennial-survey.html
Johns Hopkins University. (n.d.). The changing generational values: Examining workplace values from Baby Boomers to Generation Z.
National Women’s History Museum. (2013). Take our daughters and sons to work day. https://www.womenshistory.org/articles/take-our-daughters-and-sons-work-day
Society for Human Resource Management. (2023). New SHRM research details age discrimination in the workplace. https://www.shrm.org/about/press-room/new-shrm-research-details-age-discrimination-workplace
Zurich Insurance Group. (2022). How will Gen Z change the workplace? https://www.zurich.com/en/media/magazine/2022/how-will-gen-z-change-the-future-of-work
About Deborah Stallings, MA, SHRM-SCP
Deborah Stallings is a visionary CEO, speaker and educator, and human resources strategist who turns workplace chaos into clarity. She helps leaders handle what hurts before it happens, restore trust, and build high-performing teams rooted in purpose, truth, and care.
Her story began in Chicago’s public housing and on her grandparents’ farm in Mississippi, where she learned resilience, helping to care for her paralyzed mother and younger brother. Those humble beginnings shaped her faith, courage, lifelong learning, and the belief that leadership is a sacred responsibility to serve, uplift, and build with integrity.
As Founder and CEO of HR Anew, Deborah has spent more than 30 years transforming organizations through inclusive leadership and strategic HR innovation. Known for delivering hard truths with grace, she helps CEOs, executives, and nonprofit leaders make wise decisions that protect people, culture, and results.
When you work with Deborah, you gain more than an advisor; you gain a collaborator in transformation. Her team of Human Resources (HR), Recruitment, Training, and Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO) experts shares her values of wisdom, excellence, continuous learning, and servant leadership. Together, they deliver solutions that prevent or reduce risk, save time and money, and create workplaces where people thrive.
Credentials and Impact
- 27 years CEO and Chief HR Officer, HR Anew.
- 35+ years HR expertise: Human Resources Strategy | Recruitment |Talent Development | Workplace Investigations.
- Fractional and fully outsourced strategic HR solutions for healthcare and mission-minded small businesses.
- Workplace Investigations and Training Expert for Government and Enterprise Employers.
- Featured Speaker on People | Purpose | Performance.
- Mom | Grandmother | Christian Educator and Teacher.
- Inspiring people to lead with confidence.
- Leads a WBENC nationally certified woman owned small business.
- Master’s Degree, Management and Leadership | Bachelor’s Degree, Business Administration, Notre Dame of Maryland University.
- Senior Certified Professional (SCP), Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM).
- Aspiring author and advocate for faith-filled, future-ready workplaces.
Deborah believes that when leaders align people, purpose, and performance, they do not just build companies; they build legacies.
About HR Anew
HR Anew is a leading human resources advisory and educational firm that integrates seamlessly into your organization to maximize success and inspire transformation. We work in harmony with your existing team or can serve as your entire HR department. Our presence brings peace of mind to executives, leaders, and teams. Whether on-site, virtual, or a customized blend of both, our solutions are designed to meet you where you are and scale as your needs evolve.
We bring deep expertise across human resources, recruitment, training, workplace investigations (EEO), inclusion and belonging initiatives, leadership development and mentoring, team development, workforce planning, and HR innovation. Guided by a vision to prioritize people and power performance, HR Anew delivers tailored solutions aligned with your strategic goals to drive measurable impact. Whether you need support with recruitment strategy, compliance, employee engagement, or strengthening your HR infrastructure, we collaborate with organizations to deliver excellence, speed, and sustainable growth.
You grow your business. We manage the HR details and complexities so you can focus on growth, impact, and the people you serve. From federal and multi-state compliance to employee relations, from engagement to performance management, we ensure your company benefits from the most current HR strategies and practices, helping you compete effectively and confidently.
Your people are your business, driving your culture, your results, and your long-term success. We are relationship builders and connectors who ensure your people are supported, informed, and empowered to perform at their highest level.
Let us get to know each other. Connect at CEO@hranew.com.